Alcoholism Begins in the Mind
I recently listened to an elder share in a meeting: “It’s the thought that precedes the drink.” In other words, alcoholism begins in the mind. He told us to watch for three warning signs in our thinking. Those signs are keeping little secrets, lying to ourselves, and carrying unresolved issues.
Then he shared his experience. An admired AA friend was gravely ill and not expected to live much longer. So, his closest AA friends brought a meeting into his home. They gathered in the living room and read “How It Works” from Chapter Five of the Big Book. During the reading, the elder looked over at his sick friend. Then a thought entered his mind: “I wonder if he will leave me his coin collection?” The thought disturbed him. Even after more than 30 years of sobriety, he saw that selfishness and self-centeredness could still surface.
The Danger of Unhealthy Thoughts
To make matters worse, shortly after the meeting, the sick friend spoke to the elder. He said he wanted the elder to have his coin collection after he passed. That moment forced the elder to face a difficult truth. Even after more than 30 years of sobriety, unhealthy thoughts could still surface. The realization horrified him.
Bringing Small Secrets Into the Light
So, he brought the thought into the open. First, he told his sponsor. Then, he shared the experience with the group. He had carried a small secret in the shadows of his alcoholic thinking. Once he exposed it, he stripped it of its power.
Honesty and Self-Examination
Alcoholics Anonymous says on page 74, “More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life.” Many of us try to appear normal on the outside. Yet on the inside, our thinking can become distorted. However, we cannot afford to lie to ourselves. As the elder closed his share with the group, he offered a clear reminder. Alcoholism is an “ugly and incurable disease.”
When unresolved issues disturb us, we need to take action. We also need to act when something deep inside remains unsettled. The same is true when resentment begins to grow. We cannot afford to live a ‘double life’. We ask God for help, we reach out to someone and talk about what is bothering us, and we turn to help others.
Taking Action to Protect Sobriety
Above all, AA reminds us to watch for resentment, dishonesty, selfishness, and fear. When these thoughts appear, we must take the right action, before things lead to picking up a drink.
Reflection: Are you carrying any unhealthy thoughts (little secrets, lies, unresolved issues)?